Zen: (noun) A Japanese school of Mahayana Buddhism emphasizing the value of meditation and intuition.

Monday, May 20, 2013

...but I'm not bitter...

Note:  Misspellings are intentional to keep from popping up on Google and other Internet searches.  I'm really not this stupid...most of the time.

This weekend was one of disappointment and disillusion for me.  All because sometimes, life just isn't fair.  Sometimes, just because life isn't fair, things don't turn out the way they should.  I'm often overhead quoting the Lion King to my children.

"Life's not fair Simba."

Fuck you Scar.

Why, you may ask, are you on a tear about life not being fair Sherry?  Well thank you for asking, I'll be happy to tell you.

So my singing son tried out for and won a spot in our local Italiann Festival's version of Americann Idol, aptly named...Italiann Idol.  It's not a big deal, we live in a fairly small town but exciting none the less.  The competition consisted of instrument players, singers and dancers.  Brian was, by far, the best singer. (A lot of people said that without me even prompting them!  I swear!)  But did he win?  Nope.  Didn't even place.

I wouldn't have minded except that after the competition I find out that all of the winners belonged to families that are part of the "in" crowd at the church (who hosted the event).  Apparently the kid who won, always wins and acts like it.  So my boy got cheated out of $200 because I'm lapsed Catholic who wouldn't be all caught up in something like this anyway.  If there's one thing I avoid at all costs, it's playing politics.  I have to do it a lot at work, I sure as hell don't want to do it in my personal life too.  But I'm not bitter mind you...

Then, we headed to the Blumeey's.  The Blumeey's are part of a national organization that recognizes excellence in high school theatre.  Thirty-two schools participated this year, from the Charlotte area, of which our group was one.  We didn't get one nomination...not one.  We were disappointed because our kids worked so hard on our production of Beauty and the Beast (including a stellar performance by a rising young star who you can hear here) but we just figured other schools were better.

Until last night.  You see, another school not only got nominated for best overall performance for the same production (using the same costumes we rented for our production) but their male lead was nominated for best actor.  We were all very excited to see this performance since we knew it must have been better than ours right?



Each school nominated for best overall performance performed one ensemble number from their show.  This school chose the "Be Our Guest" number.  It was no where near as good as our's was.  We were all speechless.  Then the young man nominated as best actor in the show sang.  Same result.
How do I know they were bad?  Because the other schools WE SO FREAKING GOOD!  Even if we had gotten the nomination, there's no way we would have won because the kids and school that won deserved to win.  These kids are so talented their performances brought good tears to your eyes.  But the school nominated for their rendition of Beauty and the Beast...well...how to say this delicately...well they just weren't as good as we were!

Setting aside the fact that most of the schools nominated for anything were either from the wealthier areas of Charlotte or were from pricey private schools (we're a public school), I was still left scratching my head.  How in the name of God did this school get nominated over us?  Was I missing something?  Again, all of our kids and parents and teachers were rendered speechless (which, for a group of actors, singers and dancers is really saying something).

Then, after the awards were complete and we were milling around in the lobby, the drama teacher said, "You know, I knew we weren't part of the "in" crowd at the meetings for these things but I never thought it would impact the nomination and award process."


Politics strike again.

But I'm not bitter.


Win or lose we're a good lookin' bunch.
Me and Elmo (aka Bill)


  1. You know what upsets me the most about this sort of thing is that before our kids have even actually gotten to really begin, before they have even gotten their foot in the door of the big world, they are learning that there is a lot of injustice out there and its who know you know that counts. It is so hard to keep teaching the same lessons on good character, the good guy always wins, honesty is the best policy, walk in the light, do your best because at the end of the day you have to be content with the job you did and the person who is looking back at you from that bathroom mirror....blah blah blah. Its discouraging.

    1. Amen Annette. I wanted to put that in my post but couldn't seem to find the words. Thank you for yours.

      It really is so discouraging.

  2. They're stupid those people that made their kids the winners even though they didn't deserve it.. they think they're doing the best for them by making them winners.. but they're not teaching them about fair competition, or coping with second (or third) best, .. I hate injustice, these things should be fair fair fair. Sorry to hear but I did so enjoy your photos. You lot scrub up good! xxx

  3. My daughter when younger joined an amateur dramatic group - she was dead keen on acting. She loved it... at the start... then she didn't get a major part in one of the productions, she was heartbroken. I explained it can't always go her way. She took her place in the background and waited for the next auditions... and the next... And then you realise that the same kids were getting all the best parts and their parents were the big performers, directors, etc. in the adult version. By now my daughter was a stroppy teenager and so challenged the lady who "ran" the kids group. She effectively admitted she had to pick the kids of the "in crowd" or she'd effectively just get bullied to bits over it. My daughter called me at home to pick her up early that day - she never went back.

    What an awful way to run anything. Still my daughter learnt early it isn't what you know it is who you know fat too often in this world.

  4. Perhaps the lesson sparred by Scar is indeed the true meaning of life...I think that knowing it and even learning it at a young age has a great benefit...my take on the Blummeys is that it's all about the money and those that have it, and contribute....The Arts aren't any different than Sports, or Academia, and certainly no different than Politics....Understanding the challenges of your future success, as this applies, certainly will make a great deal of difference in either the achievement or not of ones goals in life...

  5. I am sorry to hear of this. This brings up a lot of bullying, nice-guys-finish last crap for me, so it's always a challenge in reading something like this. This happens a lot in sports too - the hockey coaches here get harangued often by parents who feel their kid is the best player and isn't getting the most ice time. It's a juggling act, and the coaches have to hear it all the time - and they are just volunteers. Squeaky wheel gets the grease kind of deal. It IS discouraging, but it just seems to be how it is, unfortunately. Nonentheless, good things do happen to good kids. There is always a reason to have them do their best, even if the result isn't what they wanted.


    Love the pics of the family though :)